Friday, September 9, 2011

The 10 Year Anniversary

The 9/11 anniversary is on Sunday. Every time I turn on the computer I am jarred by all of the photos. When I turn on the radio I cry when I hear the stories. I know the press is probably just trying to honor those who died and possibly bring some comfort to those who lost loved ones that day. I know it is a devastating day in our history.

I just can’t handle it. I am a very sensitive person and seeing the photos and reading the stories make me cry. Big, fat, elephant sized tears. Like every other human being in this country, and most human beings on this earth, I will never forget what happened that day. Seeing it all over again isn’t reminding me of anything. How can you be reminded when you never forgot?

It just makes me incredibly sad. My heart breaks all over again. And the thing is, I can’t NOT read the stories or look at the pictures. Though I try to pass over the article I see about 9/11 online, I just can’t do it. For some reason I put myself through the pain all over again. Maybe I do it because I know there are people who still suffer with real pain from that day. And really, being sad for a few days every year about it is nothing compared to what some people went through and are still going through.

But I just can’t handle it. Unlike millions of people, I will not be turning on my TV to watch coverage. I will not read articles online, I will not listen to radio programs. It doesn’t mean I don’t care, it surely doesn’t mean I am not affected. It just means my heart can’t take the pain anymore.

9 comments:

blueviolet said...

I'm with you. I don't want to relive it again. I want to move forward and not look back. We've looked back enough. Positive thinking as we move ahead!

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

We too are avoiding it like the plaque. It does the same to us. I do not understand why we must constantly look back at this as a nation? Why do we do this all the time. I understand the need to grieve but really 10 yrs?
I was in the midst of it all that day. I will never ever forget - I don't need these "specials".
So you are not the only one not watching. We are boycotting them here!!

Rox said...

It's a sign of good self-awareness to know what you can and cannot handle.

Intense Guy said...

I'm with you... I will be studiously avoiding as much of the coverage as I can...

The anger this event causes me isn't healthy. The loss of life, of freedoms, of taxpayer money, the waste of the following war(s) ... it all rankles me to no end.

And its not that I can't appreciate or recognise the the loss suffered by the families and firends of the thousands that died.... I jsut can't deal with it.

Keeper of the Skies Wife said...

I'm a right there with you. I watch a show the other day of the children of 9/11. I cried the entire hour. I can't do it again. I won't be turning my TV on at all that day. Not that I won't be remembering the ones who died....just don't want to feel that sadness again.

YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

I'm still mad...I'm also sad but mostly just pissed off.

Helene said...

Ugh, I know what you mean. I've been watching it a little bit here and there and find myself in tears, esp when they show the kids of 9/11. Such a sad and tragic day.

Parsley said...

I ran away from the television on this day. It's too much.

Visiting from Iggy's mention of you.

Sarah said...

You have been MIA lately! Miss your blog!